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Abstract: This article explores the distinction between authentic and self-serving applications of emotional intelligence (EI) in leadership. While EI refers to the ability to understand and manage emotions, leaders utilize this competency in different ways - some authentically to connect with others, others more manipulatively for self-gain. The research presented finds authentic EI fosters high-trust, collaborative cultures and performance through empathizing with stakeholders, while self-serving EI breeds toxicity and disengagement. Examples of leaders demonstrating authentic EI through care, vulnerability and accountability are provided, such as Tim Cook and Brené Brown, contrasted with examples of self-interested leaders like Adam Neumann and Elizabeth Holmes who undermined culture. The article offers recommendations for developing authentic EI through self-reflection, active listening, generous feedback and genuine interest in others. Overall, leaders are advised to consider whether their EI stems from integrity or self-interest, as authentic application anchored in understanding people empowers thriving organizational cultures.
Emotional intelligence (EI) has become an increasingly important leadership competency in today's organizations. However, the way leaders utilize and apply their EI can differ greatly - some do so authentically to better understand and connect with others, while others take a more self-serving approach to manipulate situations and people for their own gain. This distinction is crucial, as authentic EI fosters environments of trust, collaboration and high performance, while self-serving EI breeds toxicity, disengagement and low morale. As a leader, it is important to self-reflect on whether one's EI comes from a place of authentic care and concern for others, or is used more as a tool to look good and get one's way.
Today we will explore the research foundation differentiating authentic and self-serving EI, provide practical examples of each, and offer recommendations for leaders to develop and apply their EI from a truly authentic place.
Defining Authentic and Self-Serving EI
Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to perceive, understand and manage emotions - in both oneself and others (Goleman, 1995). Researchers have found EI to be a key driver of leadership effectiveness and organizational success (Cote et al., 2010; Walter et al., 2011). However, not all applications of EI have the same outcomes. Authentic EI involves using one's skills to consciously understand others' feelings and perspectives with care, concern and compassion (Kernis, 2003). In contrast, self-serving EI manipulates emotions for personal gain or self-interest, rather than others' wellbeing (Austin, 2004).
Authentic EI enables leaders to:
Build trust and rapport by empathizing with others' situations authentically
Foster cooperation through considering different viewpoints
Motivate high performance by appealing to team members' intrinsic drivers
Self-serving EI allows leaders to:
Influence others disingenuously through selective empathy
Control conversations and agendas to serve own interests
Demotivate through insincere or conditional praise focused on appearances
While both types involve emotional skills, authentic EI stems from integrity and caring for people, versus using emotions as a tool for selfish objectives.
Authentic EI in Practice
Successful leaders demonstrate authentic EI through relationship-focused behaviors that create psychologically safe, high-trust cultures. Consider well-known CEO Brené Brown, who leads with empathy, vulnerability and courage. Through authentic self-reflection and understanding others, Brown built a research institute and widespread following. Other examples include:
Apple - Tim Cook: Cook leads with humanity, consciously considering how decisions affect people. During COVID, he prioritized employees’ wellbeing, empathizing through personal videos. This authentic care has maintained Apple's high-performing, purpose-driven culture despite Jobs' departure.
Starbucks - Howard Schultz: Schultz led the company with a "partnership" model, deeply caring about baristas' lives and futures. After the 2008 recession, he rehired every employee laid off with a year of health coverage - an authentic act of compassion motivating long loyalty.
Google - Sundar Pichai: Pichai leads with empathy and accessibility, making time to understand colleagues. During BLM protests, he sent a thoughtful email acknowledging systemic racism and Google's responsibility to create equal opportunity through authentic diversity initiatives. This has strengthened Google’s innovative culture.
In each case, authentic EIfrom a genuine place of caring and understanding created high-trust, engaged cultures where people proudly work at their best.
Self-Serving EI: A Recipe for Toxicity
In contrast, leaders employing self-serving EI manipulate emotions disingenuously and conditionally to control agendas and appearances. This breeds disengagement, distrust and low performance over time. Consider disgraced CEOs like Martin Winterkorn of Volkswagen, who prioritized profits through a “clean diesel” deception that cost the company billions. Other examples include:
WeWork - Adam Neumann: Neumann led with a vision of changing the world but actually prioritized self-interest, living extravagantly off WeWork's funds. He manipulated board decisions and misled investors through selectively applied optimism rather than empathy - gutting the company's culture and value.
Theranos - Elizabeth Holmes: Holmes projected passion to unrealistically influence investors but demonstrated little care or integrity for patients, misleading them and partners. Her EI skills served dishonest objectives rather than stakeholders' wellbeing, breeding distrust and legal consequences for the startup.
Uber - Travis Kalanick: Kalanick prioritized growth through bravado but showed little genuine care for driver-partners or ethical standards. His transactional, self-serving use of EI fostered a toxic "bro culture" culminating in public scandals, losing billions in value for Uber.
In each case, short term self-interest and insincere use of EI to manipulate bred long-term cultural consequences of distrust, disengagement and decline for the organizations. Authentic care and empathy create thriving cultures; self-serving approaches undermine them.
Developing Authentic EI Leadership
To strengthen authentic EI leadership, focus inward through self-reflection and outward through caring engagement with others. Recommended practices include:
Conduct Regular Self-Assessments: Identify unconscious biases and behaviors showing care more for appearances than truly understanding others. Actively solicit 360-degree feedback to spot blind spots.
Practice Vulnerability and Active Listening: Admit weaknesses and actively listen with an open, non-judgmental posture to understand different perspectives. This builds trust far more than selective advocacy alone.
Give Generous, Honest Feedback: Provide constructive feedback with compassion to help others grow authentically. Toxic positivity serves self-interests over true development.
Foster Psychological Safety: Create conditions where people feel supported taking risks and expressing ideas/feelings freely without fear. This allows authentic discussion and learning.
Show Genuine Care and Interest Daily: Demonstrate care through small acts like learning about employees' lives and interests to foster daily rapport-building over time.
Developing authentic EI through consistent self-awareness and caring engagement strengthens cultures where people proudly perform at their best. Overall, a leader's EI matters greatly - ensure application stems from genuine care and understanding versus self-serving manipulation for lasting organizational success.
Conclusion
In today's world requiring emotional astuteness, leaders possessing strong emotional intelligence hold clear advantages. However, not all applications of EI are equal - authentic EI stemming from integrity and care for others cultivates high-trust, engaged cultures of excellence, while self-serving EI used to control situations and appearances undermines organizations over time. Through self-reflection, vulnerability, generous feedback and daily rapport-building, leaders can strengthen their EI’s authentic foundations. Developing awareness of whether one's EI comes from a place of genuine care or self-interest ensures optimal leadership impact and organizational prosperity. Leaders advancing with authentic EI anchored in integrity and understanding people authentically empower thriving cultures where individuals gladly perform at their best.
References
Austin, E. J. (2004). An investigation of the relationship between trait emotional intelligence and emotional task performance. Personality and Individual Differences, 36(8), 1855-1864. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2003.10.013
Cote, S., Lopes, P. N., Salovey, P., & Miners, C. T. H. (2010). Emotional intelligence and leadership emergence in small groups. The Leadership Quarterly, 21(3), 496–508. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.leaqua.2010.03.012
Goleman, D. (1995). Emotional intelligence. Bantam Books.
Kernis, M. H. (2003). Toward a conceptualization of optimal self-esteem. Psychological Inquiry, 14(1), 1-26. https://doi.org/10.1207/S15327965PLI1401_01
Walter, F., Cole, M. S., & Humphrey, R. H. (2011). Emotional intelligence: Sine qua non of leadership or folderol? Academy of Management Perspectives, 25(1), 45-59. https://doi.org/10.5465/amp.25.1.45
Additional Reading
Westover, J. H. (2024). Optimizing Organizations: Reinvention through People, Adapted Mindsets, and the Dynamics of Change. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.3
Westover, J. H. (2024). Reinventing Leadership: People-Centered Strategies for Empowering Organizational Change. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.4
Westover, J. H. (2024). Cultivating Engagement: Mastering Inclusive Leadership, Culture Change, and Data-Informed Decision Making. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.5
Westover, J. H. (2024). Energizing Innovation: Inspiring Peak Performance through Talent, Culture, and Growth. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.6
Westover, J. H. (2024). Championing Performance: Aligning Organizational and Employee Trust, Purpose, and Well-Being. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.7
Citation: Westover, J. H. (2024). Workforce Evolution: Strategies for Adapting to Changing Human Capital Needs. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.8
Westover, J. H. (2024). Navigating Change: Keys to Organizational Agility, Innovation, and Impact. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.11
Jonathan H. Westover, PhD is Chief Academic & Learning Officer (HCI Academy); Chair/Professor, Organizational Leadership (UVU); OD Consultant (Human Capital Innovations). Read Jonathan Westover's executive profile here.
Suggested Citation: Westover, J. H. (2024). Is Your Emotional Intelligence Authentic, or Self-Serving?. Human Capital Leadership Review, 14(2). doi.org/10.70175/hclreview.2020.14.2.7