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Abstract: This article explores the concerning workplace phenomenon of "gaslighting" - when a boss manipulates or distorts reality in an attempt to undermine an employee's sense of self and confidence. The article defines common gaslighting tactics managers may use, such as denying past statements, invalidating employee experiences, and isolating the worker. It outlines the serious negative consequences of gaslighting, including increased stress, anxiety, depression, and job burnout. To address this issue, the article provides research-backed recommendations for employees, such as documenting incidents, seeking support from colleagues and HR, and having direct but respectful discussions with the manager. The article also presents industry-specific case examples to illustrate how gaslighted employees can constructively respond. Ultimately, the article emphasizes the need for organizations to recognize and prevent gaslighting behavior to foster healthier, higher-performing work cultures.
Having a good relationship with one's direct manager or boss is crucial for employee job satisfaction, productivity, and retention. However, some managers engage in dishonest, harmful, and unethical behavior towards their reports. One such behavior is known as "gaslighting", which involves a boss manipulating or distorting reality in an attempt to sow self-doubt and confusion in their employee. Gaslighting has dire psychological consequences if not addressed properly.
Today we will explore what gaslighting behavior looks like in the workplace, its harmful effects, and provide specific, research-backed recommendations for what an employee can do if they believe their boss may be gaslighting them.
Defining Workplace Gaslighting
Before proposing solutions, it is important to clearly define what gaslighting behavior looks like in an organizational context. The term "gaslighting" originated from the 1938 play and 1944 film Gaslight, where a husband manipulates his wife into doubting her own sanity. In the workplace, gaslighting involves a boss systematically distorting, denying, or twisting situations and facts to confuse and undermine an employee's sense of reality. Some common gaslighting tactics managers may use include:
Denying they ever said or did something, even if the employee has proof. For example, denying they gave an assignment or deadline.
Invalidating the employee's feelings or experiences. For example, telling them they are "too sensitive" or their concerns are "unreasonable".
Constantly changing requirements or expectations without notice. Then denying the original requirements were ever communicated.
Taking credit for the employee's work or accomplishments. Then dismissing the employee's contributions.
Blaming the employee for problems or issues they did not cause.
Using sarcasm, put-downs, or public humiliation to diminish the employee's self-esteem over time.
Isolating the employee from colleagues and support networks within the organization.
The constant undermining, denying, and confusing tactics leave employees doubting their memory, judgement, and perception of events - which is the hallmark of gaslighting.
Why Gaslighting Is Harmful
While some managers may not realize the harm caused, gaslighting behavior has serious negative consequences for employee well-being and the organization. Some key harmful effects of gaslighting include:
Increased stress, anxiety, and loss of confidence as employees struggle to trust their own judgement and perception of reality.
Depression, as constant self-doubt erodes mental health and self-esteem over prolonged periods.
Poorer job performance due to loss of motivation, increased errors from lack of clarity on goals or expectations.
Job burnout from constantly working to "prove" themselves and second-guessing decisions.
High turnover costs as employees may leave to escape the abusive environment.
Hostile and toxic work culture if colleagues also experience or witness gaslighting behavior.
Legal liability and reputational damage if gaslighting causes severe psychological harm or creates a constructive dismissal case.
Clearly, gaslighting jeopardizes an employee's well-being and career, harms company culture, and puts the organization at risk. It must be confronted and managed appropriately at the earliest signs.
Recommended Actions for the Employee
Given the negative impacts of gaslighting, what specific steps should an employee take if they believe their manager may be engaging in such behavior? Based on research and expert organizational psychologist recommendations, the following actions are suggested:
Document all incidents objectively and factually: Compile a private written record of dates, times, quotes, actions, and impacts of all concerning interactions with the manager. Only include verifiable facts and avoid emotional language. These records can later prove patterns if needed.
Talk with trusted colleagues or HR privately about experiences: Inquire confidentially if others have noticed inconsistent behavior from the manager. Having validation from others helps determine if perceptions seem distorted, as the gaslighter intends. However, be discreet to avoid professional repercussions.
Have a respectful but direct discussion with the manager: Schedule a private meeting and clearly yet calmly state how certain actions are impacting work and well-being like increased anxiety. Refer to documentation professionally. Do not accuse, just explain impacts and request honest discussion to find solutions (12).
Seek advice from Employee Assistance Program or counselor: Use any mental health or consultative support programs available through workplace benefits. They can provide an objective viewpoint and options one may not see due to emotional exhaustion from gaslighting or self-doubt.
Explore mediation or involving HR as a neutral party: Mediation attempts impartial resolution. If prior steps fail, meet jointly with HR to communicate documented experiences neutrally for investigation and next steps like action planning or changes in work assignments.
Consider leaving only as a last resort after documenting all efforts: While many impacts make leaving feel necessary to escape abuse, do not quit impulsively. Give appropriate notice once full internal and legal processes are exhausted and future employment opportunities secured beforehand (15).
Industry-specific Case Examples
To make the above recommendations more applicable, below are two fictionalized but industry-specific case examples showing what a gaslighted employee could potentially do in those sectors:
Case 1: Healthcare Administration
Jamie is the office manager at a small medical clinic. Over months, their boss Dr. Smith began appearing irritated, blaming minor issues on Jamie publicly. When Jamie stayed late to complete a task, Dr. Smith yelled at not being informed, despite no prior deadline given.
Jamie started documenting each incident anonymously at home. When co-workers noticed Dr. Smith's short temper, Jamie discreetly asked if they experienced anything similar lately. All had, to their surprise.
Jamie scheduled a respectful meeting with Dr. Smith, referred to notes calmly explaining increased anxiety from inconsistencies. Dr. Smith dismissed worries as overreactions. Jamie then requested HR mediation, sharing documentation. HR planned sensitivity training for Dr. Smith with Jamie’s input on solutions.
Case 2: Information Technology
Sara is a systems analyst at a tech firm. Her new manager Michael took over and Sara noticed changes - like criticizing draft proposals Sara knew contained his feedback. She began feeling confused and hesitant.
Through the employee assistance program, Sara learned she was experiencing gaslighting signs. In a meeting with Michael and HR, Sara respectfully shared corroborated documentation of contradictions impacting her work. HR arranged counseling and a temporary transfer to another team while investigating further.
Conclusion
Gaslighting is an all-too-common form of toxic management some employees experience. While difficult to address, early documentation of objective facts and seeking validation, counseling, mediation or transferring work assignments can help manage and resolve gaslighting situations constructively before serious harm occurs. With employees empowered to discreetly yet proactively respond to inappropriate manager behaviors in a supported way, organizations can foster much healthier, higher performing and lawful work cultures. With leadership awareness and preventative training, gaslighting behaviors may be identified and corrected early to benefit all parties involved.
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Jonathan H. Westover, PhD is Chief Academic & Learning Officer (HCI Academy); Chair/Professor, Organizational Leadership (UVU); OD Consultant (Human Capital Innovations). Read Jonathan Westover's executive profile here.
Suggested Citation: Westover, J. H. (2025). Identifying and Addressing Gaslighting Behavior in the Workplace. Human Capital Leadership Review. 17(2). doi.org/10.70175/hclreview.2020.17.2.14
