Listen to this article:
Abstract: This article explores effective strategies for giving and receiving compliments in the workplace. Through a review of relevant literature, best practices are identified for crafting sincere, specific, and well-timed compliments that recognize employees’ efforts and impacts beyond themselves. Key guidelines are provided for both sharing positive feedback and accepting praise graciously without dismissal or defensiveness. Specific organizational examples from fields such as financial services, technology, and nonprofits demonstrate practical application of research-backed strategies. Complimenting colleagues’ achievements and contributions in meaningful, respectful ways is shown to cultivate respect, connection, motivation, and productivity across all levels. By cultivating compliments as a daily interpersonal habit through focused, thoughtful exchanges, organizational culture can be strengthened to promote fulfillment for individuals and success of shared goals.
As business leaders and colleagues, we all strive to build a positive, productive work environment characterized by mutual understanding and respect. While critiques and constructive feedback certainly have their place, focusing solely on areas for improvement can breed resentment and hinder cooperation.
Today we will explore research demonstrating how thoughtfully giving and receiving compliments at work can cultivate connection, cultivate psychological safety, boost morale, and increase productivity in meaningful ways. Though simple acts of positive reinforcement, we have the power to make each others' days just a little bit brighter and fuel continued growth.
Giving Compliments Effectively
Before diving into specific strategies, it is important to note that not all compliments are created equal. Research from Ford (2018) highlights three key ingredients for an effective compliment: sincerity, specificity, and timeliness. First, the compliment must be given sincerely from a place of genuine appreciation, not manipulation or false flattery. Second, it is best to be as specific as possible by noting a particular action, trait, or outcome rather than vague generalities. Specific compliments allow the receiver to internalize the praise and repeat the behavior being recognized. Finally, compliments lose their impact if not delivered in a reasonably timely manner after the behavior or achievement being acknowledged. With these foundational principles in mind, here are some best practices for crafting and delivering compliments at work:
Focus on effort, not ability: Complimenting someone's work ethic, diligence, perseverance, or other controllable factors within their control conveys respect and encourages continued growth mindset more so than praising innate talent (Lockwood & Kunda, 1997). For example, "I appreciate how hard you worked on this project" versus "You're so gifted at this."
Note impacts beyond yourself: Highlighting how someone's contributions benefit the team, project outcomes, client or customer satisfaction, partnership, or business results helps further motivate high performance for the collective good (Fleenor et al., 2010). For instance, "Your excellent leadership helped the team reach an important milestone" rather than "Good job."
Follow the BAT sandwich method: Using the "BAT" structure of beginning the interaction on a positive note, inserting specific constructive feedback or requests in the middle, and ending on another positive can soften delivery of critical comments. However, this method should be avoided when only sharing compliments without other messages to balance it out (Otto et al., 2016).
Pass compliments up as often as down: While recognizing direct reports and peers, do not forget to acknowledge higher-ups as well to foster appreciation across all levels. At the same time, avoid excesses of ass-kissing that undermine authenticity and morale.
Share both privately and publicly: One-on-one conversations allow for deeper discussion while public recognition, like shouting outs at team meetings, help celebrate examples worth emulating more broadly (Achor, 2010).
Receiving Compliments Graciously
Naturally, giving compliments is only half of cultivating a positive feedback culture - the other half centers on accepting compliments respectfully. Research indicates people feel unease both giving and receiving compliments due to discomfort from praise (Harel et al., 2018). However, learning to accept compliments with humility, without dismissiveness or defensiveness, is crucial to encourage future positive exchanges. Some best practices include:
Say thank you sincerely: A simple yet heartfelt "thank you" meaningfully acknowledges the giver's thoughtfulness without diminishing the compliment. Find authentic ways to express appreciation.
Avoid reflexively denying or minimizng praise: Downplaying compliments undercuts the giver and discourages future recognition. Instead, own your accomplishments respectfully.
Ask follow-up questions for clarity: To better internalize the feedback, asking about what specifically was valued can reiterate the behavior to repeat without seeming boastful.
Redirect the conversation back to the giver or team efforts: Share how the compliment motivates continued service rather than dwelling on oneself. For instance, "I'm glad I could help the project's success."
Pass compliments on when appropriate: Thank the giver and note how coworkers equally contributed. Sharing credit lifts all boats.
Remember compliments later when feeling discouraged: Positive reinforcement, internalized respectfully, can boost resilience during tougher times.
With regular practice, both giving and receiving compliments can become more comfortable social lubricants at the office. The next section explores specific organizational examples.
Applying Compliment Best Practices
Let's explore how these principles play out across various work contexts through three brief scenarios:
Financial Services Firm: As a manager at a wealth management firm, Anna aims to recognize team members meeting individualized sales targets. In one-on-one check-ins, she praises Sophie's client acquisition through her warm charisma and follow through - "Your ability to quickly build rapport has expanded our client base, which supports the whole team." Later, Anna tells the group - "Sophie is a role model in living our core values."
Tech Startup: The engineering team at Bob's coding startup Slack channel daily with quick wins. When spotting Charles' thorough documentation streamlining onboarding, Bob directs a @mention his way stating - "Great labeling ensures new hires have everything they need - what you do improves our culture. Keep it up!" Charles responds thanking Bob and the team for their partnership.
Nonprofit: At an environmental conservation non-profit, Director James sends Danielle a note copying her supervisor - "Your leadership of the tree planting volunteers gained local sponsorship. Your vision and work ethic are an inspiration as we protect more acres." Danielle is touched, ensures to pass appreciation to all involved, and recommits to the mission.
In each case, specific actions are recognized showing impacts beyond the individual. Praise emphasizes controllable factors and is shared both privately and publicly as appropriate. The recipients respond graciously, expressing thanks while deflecting focus back to collaborative efforts - cultivating an ongoing feedback loop.
Conclusion
Thoughtfully giving and receiving compliments builds respect, connection, motivation, and optimism in the workplace. Simple yet meaningful gestures of positive reinforcement through sincere, specific, and well-timed compliments promote productivity, collaboration, and continuous learning across all levels. While uncomfortable at first, with practice both sharing and accepting praise can become appreciated social norms strengthening any organizational culture. By focusing on honoring each others' efforts and contributions, we foster a climate where colleagues feel heard, respected, and energized to achieve more together. Overall, cultivating compliments as a daily habit has the power to make both individual jobs and the collective mission more fulfilling through humanizing our professional interactions and results.
References
Achor, S. (2010, January 1). Positive intelligence. Harvard Business Review. https://hbr.org/2010/01/positive-intelligence
Ford, T. E. (2018). Does compliment behavior promote liking and rapport? A reconsideration. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 75, 157–163. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2017.12.003
Fleenor, J. W., McCauley, C. D., & Brutus, S. (2010).360° feedback intervention effectiveness and its determinants. Applied Psychology, 59, 504-532. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1464-0597.2009.00430.x
Harel, A., Barzilay-Kerekovitch, I., & Kaplan, A. (2018). Compliment the effort or the person? The mediating role of perceived autonomy support and need satisfaction between compliment type and internalization. Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 48(10), 585-597. https://doi.org/10.1111/jasp.12549
Lockwood, P., & Kunda, Z. (1997). Superstars and me: Predicting the impact of role models on the self. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 73(1), 91–103. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.73.1.91
Otto, S., Holling, H., & Goritz, A. S. (2016). Compliment Behaviour in the Workplace as an Instrument of Leadership. European Journal of Work and Organizational Psychology. https://doi.org/10.1080/1359432x.2016.1218287
Additional Reading
Westover, J. H. (2024). Optimizing Organizations: Reinvention through People, Adapted Mindsets, and the Dynamics of Change. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.3
Westover, J. H. (2024). Reinventing Leadership: People-Centered Strategies for Empowering Organizational Change. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.4
Westover, J. H. (2024). Cultivating Engagement: Mastering Inclusive Leadership, Culture Change, and Data-Informed Decision Making. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.5
Westover, J. H. (2024). Energizing Innovation: Inspiring Peak Performance through Talent, Culture, and Growth. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.6
Westover, J. H. (2024). Championing Performance: Aligning Organizational and Employee Trust, Purpose, and Well-Being. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.7
Citation: Westover, J. H. (2024). Workforce Evolution: Strategies for Adapting to Changing Human Capital Needs. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.8
Westover, J. H. (2024). Navigating Change: Keys to Organizational Agility, Innovation, and Impact. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.11
Westover, J. H. (2024). Inspiring Purpose: Leading People and Unlocking Human Capacity in the Workplace. HCI Academic Press. doi.org/10.70175/hclpress.2024.12
Jonathan H. Westover, PhD is Chief Academic & Learning Officer (HCI Academy); Chair/Professor, Organizational Leadership (UVU); OD Consultant (Human Capital Innovations). Read Jonathan Westover's executive profile here.
Suggested Citation: Westover, J. H. (2024). How to Give and Receive Compliments at Work: Cultivating Respect, Connection, and Productivity through Positive Feedback. Human Capital Leadership Review, 14(4). doi.org/10.70175/hclreview.2020.14.3.104.10
