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Balancing It All: Overcoming Emotional Exhaustion from Work-Family Conflicts

Updated: 8 hours ago

By Jonathan H. Westover, PhD

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Abstract: This research brief examines the issue of work-family conflict and emotional exhaustion experienced by many female employees attempting to balance work and family responsibilities. The brief reviews the key drivers of work-family conflict according to academic literature, such as inflexible workplace cultures, unpredictable schedules, gender biases, and unequal division of labor at home. Practical strategies are then presented for overcoming emotional exhaustion, including promoting flexibility and boundaries, cultivating a respite culture, enhancing paternal support, and setting reasonable expectations. Specific case examples across industries provide pragmatic recommendations for effective implementation. The brief concludes with a call for organizational leaders and researchers to advocate evidence-based solutions that empower female employees' wellbeing and maximize their career potential through genuinely supportive work-life integration practices.

As a leadership consultant and researcher who has spent the past 15 years working closely with organizations to advance diversity, equity, and inclusion, one issue that consistently rises to the top is helping all employees, but especially female employees, effectively manage the challenges of balancing work and family responsibilities without experiencing high levels of emotional exhaustion.


Today we will explore recommendations that can help female workers and their employers optimize work-life integration.


Understanding the Drivers of Conflict


The first step in resolving any problem is thoroughly understanding its root causes. When it comes to work-family and family-work conflicts among female employees, researchers have identified several factors that often serve as drivers. Let's take a closer look at some of the most prominent drivers highlighted in the literature:


  • Inflexible work cultures and lack of workplace support. Many organizations still operate under the outdated assumption of an "ideal worker" with no family responsibilities. This translates into rigid expectations around availability and facetime, limited options for flexible work arrangements, absence of family-friendly policies, and an overall culture that does not support the integration of work and personal life (Butts et al., 2013). Such inflexibility plays a major role in forcing employees into an impossible choice between work and family.

  • Unpredictable work schedules. For certain female-dominated occupations like retail, healthcare, and hospitality, employees often have little control and visibility over their work schedules. Last-minute schedule changes, evening/weekend shifts, and unpredictable overtime can wreak havoc on childcare and family planning (Lambert et al., 2012). The lack of schedule control significantly amplifies work-family conflicts.

  • Caregiving responsibilities. Despite some progress, women continue to shoulder a disproportionate burden of caregiving responsibilities like childrearing, eldercare for parents/in-laws, and household chores. Juggling inflexible jobs and round-the-clock care demands often leads to role overload and conflicts (Kossek et al., 2017).

  • Gender biases and discrimination. Subtle yet pervasive biases that view career-oriented women as less committed or competent employees persist in many workplaces. This adds to the challenges faced by female workers in areas like flexible work access, career advancement opportunities, and equal treatment (O'Neil & Bilimoria, 2005).


Understanding these prominent drivers is crucial for unpacking why so many capable and hardworking women feel emotionally exhausted as they try balancing overwhelming job and family roles, often without appropriate workplace support. Let's now explore some evidence-based solutions.


Promoting a Flexible yet Productive Culture


A core theme that emerges from my research is that inflexible workplace cultures have deleterious effects on work engagement, performance, retention - and most importantly for this discussion - the wellbeing of employees with significant family responsibilities. However, many leaders worry that flexibility will compromise productivity and business outcomes. The good news is that research provides compelling evidence to the contrary.


Studies show that organizational flexibility, when implemented properly, does not negatively impact - and can sometimes even enhance - key metrics like productivity, quality, customer satisfaction, and profitability (Butts et al., 2013). Flexibility options like compressed workweeks, remote work, staggering start/end times, and results-only work environments (ROWEs) free employees from rigid structures while holding them accountable solely for outputs. Furthermore, a meta-analysis of 148 independent flexibility-productivity studies found an overall small yet positive relationship between flexibility and performance outcomes across industries and regions (Baltes et al., 1999).


To garner these benefits, flexibility needs to be a standard organizational practice rather than a special exception or favor. Small retailers like Lush Cosmetics have instituted organization-wide flexible policies with great success in boosting employee engagement and wellbeing (Lamond, 2009). Meanwhile, large firms including software giant Cisco and consulting leader PwC have flexible work as a competitive differentiator for attracting and retaining top diverse talent. My consulting engagements with such firms reveal that formalizing flexibility via clear guidelines andleader role-modeling is essential for ensuring consistency, reducing biases, and fully unleashing employee potential.


Promoting Paternal Support and Equality at Home


While flexible workplace cultures are important, research shows that prevailing gender norms at home also play a major role in exacerbating female workers' emotional exhaustion. Despite women's increased workforce participation, domestic responsibilities and childcare continue to disproportionately burden working mothers (Scott & Meade, 2020). The lack of an equal domestic partnership model where men play an equitable coparenting role intensifies the work-life conflicts faced by career women.


Interestingly, studies show that when husbands/partners actively share household labor and child responsibilities, married working women experience significantly lower levels of work-family interference and emotional strain compared to those without such support at home (Kossek & Ozeki, 1998; Nomaguchi, 2009). Cross-nationally, attitudes towards gender equality in childrearing and home duties strongly predict women's greater workforce participation and career achievements (Evertsson & Nermo, 2004). These findings suggest that promoting paternal support through awareness and cultural change is necessary for authentically empowering the careers and wellbeing of working mothers.


Organizations can play a role here too by offering family-friendly benefits like paid paternal leave, subsidized childcare, backup care solutions, and resources/trainings cultivating positive masculinity norms around caregiving. For instance, Best Buy's innovative "Dad Care" childcare benefits produced visible outcomes in bolstering fathers' involvement while supporting the retention of working mothers post-childbirth (Rapoport et al., 2002). Combining workplace flexibility and parental support can deeply enhance female workers' capacity to stay engaged and avoid burnout across their multifaceted roles.


Managing Boundaries and Tempering Unrealistic Expectations


While flexible cultures and equitable partnerships are essential, neither alone can remedy poor boundaries or overwhelming expectations that trap women into an endless cycle of trying to do it all - and feeling depleted because of perfectionist demands. Setting limits around responsiveness, committing to quality family and self-care time, and learning to say "no" respectfully are just as crucial. My experience reveals that senior leaders who openly model reasonable boundaries are best positioned to promote this behavior change across their organizations.


According to many studies, cultivating a "respite culture" where employees feel comfortable disconnecting during non-work hours without repercussions, delegating tasks to trusted colleagues, and accepting that sacrifices will sometimes occur is a viable solution for quelling burnout (Demerouti & Geurts, 2004; Imas et al., 2017). Such an approach relies on leaders motivating teams through trust rather than micromanagement and constant connectivity. Creating a mindset shift around the value of adequate recovery through small cultural tweaks like prohibiting emails after traditional work hours can go a long way.


At the individual level, learning to distinguish between genuine responsibilities and discretionary activities that sap resources is equally impactful according to research participants who demonstrated resilience. Maintaining a sense of control by frankly assessing what's truly essential versus nice-to-have helps curb unrealistic expectations that fuel emotional exhaustion (McCarthy et al., 2013; Lapierre & Allen, 2006).


It is evident that embedding flexibility in combination with equitable home division of labor, role modeling reasonable boundaries, and cultivating a respite culture focused on self-care are vital strategies that organizations and female workers can adopt to mitigate work-family conflicts and their emotional toll. Let's now examine how these solutions can play out in various sectors.


Practical Applications Across Industries


Through my consulting partnerships across diverse industries, I've observed very effective implementations of the above concepts in reducing female burnout and boosting engagement. Let me share a few promising examples to provide pragmatic recommendations for companies and leaders:


Healthcare: Many hospital systems now face extreme clinician shortages as demanding shift schedules take a toll. Adventist Health embraced flexible scheduling for nurses by establishing a tech-enabled self-scheduling system allowing staff to coordinate coverage, trade shifts easily, access shifts online. This little change resulted in 85% nursing retention rates - 30% higher than average. Other strategies like dedicated lactation rooms, childcare vouchers/ backup care reimbursement further support work-life fit.


Education: School administrators wrestle with work-life challenges similarly affecting teachers, from uncontrollable schedules to overwhelming workload. Fairfax County Public Schools in Virginia implemented compressed weeks for teachers, enabling them to teach full course load over 4 days to have extended weekends for recovery, errands, family time. Early research suggests improved wellbeing and likely longer teaching careers ahead.


Technology: Long hours as "always-on" expectation impacts diversity in tech. At Anthropic, AI safety startup, workers can set core availability periods, adjusting remaining hours flexibly around priorities. Managers lead by example spending quality off-hours with families too. Gender ratio improved from industry average 30:70 male:female to nearly equal amidst high retention rates.


Retail: Inflexible shifts negatively impacting store associates at Lowes. Now implementing satellite offices near congested areas, associates working remotely part-time on tasks like purchasing, cataloging, have seen 35% reduction in absenteeism and higher productivity since without daily commute stress. Sales conversion rates also increased 5% with happier, less drained staff.


Flexibility need not mean an "all-remote" policy. Tailored, sector-specific solutions rooted in each organization's workflow realities seem most pragmatic and impactful for overcoming work-life conflicts among female employees. With care and commitment, substantial reductions in emotional exhaustion levels seem achievable across diverse industries.


Conclusion: A Call to Action for Leaders


It is clear that work-family conflicts continue to pose formidable challenges for the wellbeing and careers of female employees, disproportionately fueling their emotional exhaustion levels. However, this brief highlights numerous evidence-based, industry-agnostic methods that both organizations and individuals can implement to mitigate role-overload and conflicts through enhanced flexibility, equitable role-sharing at home, better boundary-setting, and overall culture change centered around wellness. While cultural shifts require steadfast effort over time, even small changes consistently yielding promising outcomes across sectors.


As researchers, consultants and leaders ourselves, we are well-positioned to advocate the pragmatic solutions evidenced here and call upon executives to prioritize work-life integration more deliberately as means of not only improving the lives of women, but also boosting business metrics through happier, healthier, higher performing teams. It is my sincere hope that this discussion prompts action through sincere reflection on biases that may still limit progress, candid assessments of where workplace practices can modernize, and commitments to nurturing cultures that empower employees in all domains of their rich, multifaceted lives. With the right focus and will, organizations stand to gain tremendously by unleashing the full potential of their female talent through this win-win approach centered around flexibility, equity and humanity.


References


  • Baltes, B. B., Briggs, T. E., Huff, J. W., Wright, J. A., & Neuman, G. A. (1999). Flexible and compressed workweek schedules: A meta-analysis of their effects on work-related criteria. Journal of Applied Psychology, 84(4), 496–513. https://doi.org/10.1037/0021-9010.84.4.496

  • Butts, M. M., Casper, W. J., & Yang, T. S. (2013). How important are work–family support policies? A meta-analytic investigation of their effects on employee outcomes. Journal of Applied Psychology, 98(1), 1–25. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0030389

  • Demerouti, E., & Geurts, S. A. (2004). Towards a typology of work-home interaction. Community, Work & Family, 7(3), 285–309. https://doi.org/10.1080/1366880042000283048

  • Evertsson, M., & Nermo, M. (2004). Dependence within families and the division of labor: Comparing Sweden and the United States. Journal of Marriage and Family, 66(5), 1272–1286. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.0022-2445.2004.00094.x

  • Imas, L. M., DePietro, A. G., & Westfall, A. S. (2017). The effect of respite breaks on daily and postwork engagement. Human Performance, 30(2-3), 83–98. https://doi.org/10.1080/08959285.2017.1325157

  • Kossek, E. E., & Ozeki, C. (1998). Work-family conflict, policies, and the job-life satisfaction relationship: A review and directions for organizational behavior-human resources research. Journal of Applied Psychology, 83, 139–149. https://doi.org/10.1037//0021-9010.83.2.139

  • Kossek, E. E., Pichler, S., Bodner, T., & Hammer, L. B. (2011). Workplace social support and work–family conflict: A meta‐analysis clarifying the influence of general and work–family‐specific supervisor and organizational support. Personnel Psychology, 64(2), 289-313. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1744-6570.2011.01211.x

  • Lambert, S. J., Fugiel, P. J., & Henly, J. R. (2014). Schedule unpredictability among early career workers in the US labor market: A national snapshot. Ems Work, 75(4), 491-514. https://doi.org/10.1177/0014225314528301

  • Lamond, D. A. (2009). Rewards for companies that offer flexible working. Flexibility.com. https://www.flexibility.com/rewards-companies-offer-flexible-working/

  • Lapierre, L. M., & Allen, T. D. (2006). Work-supportive family, family-supportive supervision, use of organizational benefits, and problem-focused coping: Implications for work-family conflict and employee well-being. Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, 11(2), 169–181. https://doi.org/10.1037/1076-8998.11.2.169

  • McCarthy, A., Darcy, C., & Grady, G. (2010). Work-life balance policy and practice: Understanding line manager attitudes and behaviors. Human Resource Management Review, 20(2), 158-167. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.hrmr.2009.07.001

  • Nomaguchi, K. M. (2009). Change in work-family conflict among employed parents between 1977 and 1997. Journal of Marriage and Family, 71(1), 15-32. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2008.00581.x

  • O’Neil, D. A., & Bilimoria, D. (2005). Women’s career development phases: Idealism, endurance, and reinvention. Career Development International, 10(3), 168–189. https://doi.org/10.1108/13620430510598300

  • Rapoport, R., Bailyn, L., Fletcher, J. K., & Pruitt, B. H. (2002). Beyond work-family balance: Advancing gender equity and workplace performance. Jossey-Bass.

  • Scott, C. L., & D. L. Meade. (2020) “Work-Family Conflict in STEM: Methodological Considerations.” Workplace Health and Safety ahead-of-print. https://doi.org/10.1177/2165079920949313

 

Jonathan H. Westover, PhD is Chief Academic & Learning Officer (HCI Academy); Chair/Professor, Organizational Leadership (UVU); OD Consultant (Human Capital Innovations). Read Jonathan Westover's executive profile here.

Suggested Citation: Westover, J. H. (2024). Balancing It All: Overcoming Emotional Exhaustion from Work-Family Conflicts. Human Capital Leadership Review, 11(3). doi.org/10.70175/hclreview.2020.11.3.12

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